NYU Professor Says Traditional Networking Is ‘Nonsense’ — Real Friendships Drive True Success

For decades, professionals have been told that networking is the key to career advancement. From exchanging business cards at conferences to attending endless mixers, the idea of building a large network has been promoted as the ultimate path to opportunity. But according to an NYU professor, this traditional approach to networking is “nonsense.” Instead, he argues, genuine friendships—not transactional relationships—are the real drivers of lasting success.
Why Traditional Networking Falls Short
Networking has often been framed as a numbers game: the more contacts you have, the more doors open for you. But in practice, most people find that exchanging pleasantries at professional events rarely leads to meaningful outcomes.
The NYU professor highlights several flaws in the conventional approach:

Superficial Connections: Traditional networking often results in shallow interactions that lack trust or authenticity.
Short-Term Thinking: People approach networking with immediate benefits in mind, rather than building sustainable relationships.
Lack of Emotional Depth: Professional contacts made solely for career gain often fade quickly because there’s no personal bond.

The result is a vast “network” that feels hollow and fails to provide the support or collaboration professionals actually need.
The Case for Real Friendships
Instead of chasing surface-level contacts, the professor argues that success stems from cultivating real friendships—relationships built on trust, shared values, and genuine care. Unlike networking, friendships go beyond professional gain; they create a foundation of mutual support that lasts through career shifts, successes, and failures.
Here’s why friendships matter more:


Trust Over Transactions
Friends are more likely to advocate for you, share opportunities, and support your growth because their motivation is personal, not transactional.


Deeper Collaboration
True partnerships form when both sides genuinely enjoy working together. Friendships foster creativity, innovation, and long-term collaboration.


Resilience and Support
Careers are filled with ups and downs. Having friends who understand your struggles and cheer for your wins provides emotional stability.


Opportunities That Last
While contacts may disappear when you switch industries or jobs, friendships remain. They evolve with you and continue to open doors in unexpected ways.


Rethinking Success in the AI Era
In an age where artificial intelligence is reshaping industries and creating uncertainty about the future of work, the human element of friendship becomes even more valuable. AI can automate tasks, analyze data, and even generate content, but it cannot replicate genuine human connection. Friendships provide the trust, empathy, and collaboration that no algorithm can replace.
As the professor points out, careers are increasingly nonlinear. People pivot industries, build startups, or work in hybrid environments. In such a landscape, real friendships provide a safety net that traditional networking simply can’t offer.
Building Friendships Instead of Networking
So, how can professionals shift away from the old model of networking? The professor suggests a few key strategies:

Invest in Fewer, Deeper Relationships: Focus on people whose values align with yours rather than chasing quantity.
Show Up Authentically: Be yourself, rather than trying to impress or perform.
Give Before You Ask: Support others without expecting anything in return. Genuine generosity fosters stronger bonds.
Stay Consistent: Friendships require time and effort. Regular check-ins, shared experiences, and long-term care keep connections alive.

The Takeaway
The message is clear: success in today’s world isn’t about how many contacts you have on LinkedIn or how many business cards you’ve collected. It’s about the quality of the relationships you nurture. Traditional networking may be “nonsense,” but real friendships—built on trust, authenticity, and mutual support—are timeless drivers of personal and professional growth.

As the NYU professor emphasizes, true success isn’t built in conference halls or formal networking sessions. It’s built in conversations over coffee, shared struggles, and authentic connections that last far beyond the next job opportunity.